Everyday, millions of women suffer from what I call: Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome.

Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome includes: intense feelings of anger, resentment, vengefulness, and wanting to bitch-slap anyone who comes in contact with you.

Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome can manifest itself as: forgetting to get your usual french mani/pedis; recurring bad hair-days a la Madonna 80′s style, putting non-matching shoes in the morning; over accessorizing; common forgetfulness of birthdays, passwords, and where you left your car; among others…

What perpetuates Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome includes: being crossed, laughed at, back-stabbed, or let down by female friends, family members, or acquaintances.

The cure for Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome is unknown at the moment, but there are some remedies to alleviate the symptoms, these include:

1) Moving on from the Bitch – Ignoring the offence so that the offender gets confused and in so move on to a next, more vulnerable, target.

2) Getting Back at the Bitch - Starting to spread nasty rumors about them and see which ones will stick; sleeping with their significant other just for spite…

Doctor’s Note: Remember, Karma IS a bitch and IT will bite YOU in the ass.

3) Cutting the Bitch out of your Life – Making the person feel invisible every time they are near you, not answering phone calls, and blocking them from every known account you have on the net.

To alleviate and eradicate Thatbitchdidmewrong Syndrome I propose that women repeat the following mantras every day:

1) I am happy to be a woman.

2) I am happy that I have such wonderful women around me.

3) I will be happy when women find love.

4) I will be happy when women are lucky.

5) I will be happy when women achieve their goals.

6) I will be happy when women achieve success.

Repeat as necessary.

Fake Doc. Brenda E. Alonso, Ph. D.

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